Happy29th birthday, Adam. I love you. I miss you. These comments speak for themselves.
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
MBC2
06 Mar 2013 2 Comments
in * R. i. P. *, Adam Sontag, Admiration, Authors, Books, Films, Quotes, Sylvia Plath, Uncategorized, Words of Wisdom
• March Blog Challenge •
Day 2: Favorite Quotes
“The Edge…there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who really know where it is are the ones who have gone over.”
~ Hunter S. Thompson
“I live life like the captain of a sinking ship.”
~ Atmosphere
“There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory.” -Mark Twain
“So avoid using the word ‘very’ because it’s lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don’t use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys – to woo women – and, in that endeavor, laziness will not do. It also won’t do in your essays.”
~ Dead Poets Society
Facebook sure has come in handy with the blog challenge. Taken from the favorite quotes section on my profile:
“You are neurotic and depressed it doesn’t mean that you are sad.”
~ Everclear
“There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.”
~ Oscar Levant
“They say you only live once; but if you live like I do, once is enough!!”
~ Frank Sinatra
“Happiness amongst intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.”
~ Ernest Hemingway
“Janie, today I quit my job. and then I told my boss to go eff himself, and then I blackmailed him for almost sixty thousand dollars. Pass the asparagus.” ~ Lester Burnham (American Beauty)
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of your love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere. You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.” ~ Buddha
“Out of the ash
I rise with my red hair
and I eat men like air.”
- Sylvia Plath
:: Les femmes qui lisent sont dangereuses. ::
R. i. P.
* Adam Sontag *
4/25/84 – 7/7/03
Thank you for showing me true love. <3
"The dead govern the living" – Auguste Comte
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
Namesakes
13 Feb 2012 Leave a Comment
in * R. i. P. *, Adam, Adam Sontag, Tatum, Tatum O'Neal, Will Reed
What’s in a name? The ability to choose what I will call my children for the rest of their lives is a both a tremendous responsibility and a fulfilling opportunity. I want their names to be poignant and meaningful, not something randomly selected from a baby book with thousands of choices. Most of you who know me personally are very aware of the reasoning behind the monikers given to my kids, yet for those of you who are unfamiliar, it is my pleasure to share them with you.
Upon marrying William Reed in the fall of 2007, I took his last name, as my maiden name is Wilke. Countless individuals ask me why I’m giving my daughter the same last name given everything that has happened within the past few months and our pending divorce. Two reasons: 1) It is extremely important to me that both of my children have the same surname. 2) Reed is my legal name. That is how I am known professionally and any significant milestones I’ve had with my writing thus far have been under Sloane Reed. I have no plans on changing my legal name, regardless of the fact that it was ‘gifted’ to me by my ex-husband.
Adam Harrison Reed
Adam Bruce Douglas Sontag :: 4/25/84-7/7/03 ::
What a special way to pay homage to the person who has most influenced my life– other than my children– by sharing his name with my son. Adam Sontag….my first true love, former fiancé, and my irreplaceable best friend. I will always love him. Not a day goes by where I don’t close my eyes and see that smile and hear that voice. He helped shape me into the woman I am today. Taken from us far too soon in a tragic automobile accident, I am so proud that Adam saved the lives of other people with his selfless decision to be an organ donor. I speak for all of us who knew and loved him when I say he left a void in our hearts that will never be filled. We miss you, Adam.
I'm in the process of obtaining an actual photo. Stars remind me of those loved and lost.
Harrison Andrew Elder is Will’s deceased father. Unfortunately I do not have much information on him or a picture, so I’m hoping Angela or Holly may be able to help me with this. To give you a better idea of his physical appearance….Will is the spitting image of his dad. I do not feel comfortable speaking for my ex-husband about the love and admiration he had for his father, but I know it was of the utmost importance to him that we include his name on our son’s birth certificate. Including Harrison is way for Will’s parents to be linked to their first grandchild as they both passed before he was born.
Tatum Maris Reed
Her book, 'A Paper Life,' influenced me tremendously.
Until I read her memoir, Tatum O’Neal was largely unfamiliar to me. I’d never seen any of her acting work and the extent of my knowledge of her was: dysfunctional Hollywood childhood; major Daddy issues; intermittent drug abuse; married [and later divorced] to mild-mannered John McEnroe; and a mother. While all of the descriptions are indeed a part of her identity, I’m almost ashamed of how grossly oversimplified my previous description was, it came nowhere close to doing this strong and resilient woman justice. She’s had one hell of a life– and struggles as all humans do– yet somehow managed to escape the chaos with a sense of humor and her sanity intact. I appreciate her candor and consider her an inspiration.
Additionally, the name Tatum is unique, much like Sloane. It’s quirky without being too ‘out there.’ Thank you, Mom & Dad, for allowing me to stand out from the masses without naming me Apple, Moses, or Pilot Inspektor.
Maris Elyse McLoskey <3
I call Maris my soul sister– best friend just doesn’t adequately describe our bond. Come to think of it, I don’t even know how to describe her at all. Suffice it to say she’s the coolest person I’ve ever met and I seriously think we share a brain. These past nine years have been saturated with this incredible woman and I wouldn’t have it any other way. We’re the godmothers to each others children and she even named her daughter after me! I’ve known for a long time if I ever had a little girl I’d be returning the favor. Maris is a blessing straight from the heavens.
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
Adam the student
18 Oct 2011 Leave a Comment
in Adam, Adam Sontag, Blessings, California, Preschool
Because I did not have regular internet access, very few people knew the depths of my despair and extreme feelings of isolation in California. Upon leaving the Atascadero house my world crumbled. With the excepti
on of the death of Adam Sontag that was the lowest I have ever been in my life. However, I’ve always been one to focus on the positive– not to come across as ‘fake’– but I’d much rather count my blessings than my sorrows…..so most probably were unaware of the extent of my suffering.
Such a tremendous burden was lifted from my shoulders when the state agreed to pay for Adam’s childcare during my working hours. At zero out of pocket expense to me he attends a top-notch area preschool from 7:30 am until 5:30 pm, Mondays through Thursdays. I could have collapsed and cried tears of holy joy when my phenomenal social worker called and told me this news.
Inspirations Preschool Center is a godsend, quite literally. It reminds me so much of his former preschools in the Memphis area and the facilities, curriculum, and teachers are incredible. Adam loves his new school– and it’s an added bonus that our grocery bill is substantially cut because the program includes breakfast, lunch, and two snacks. Most likely he will be bumped up to the 4-5 year old class beginning next week. What a smart boy!
I cannot wait to post photos of the awesome pirate themed playground. My coworker and I were joking about how cool it was [he was familiar with it through the churches in the area] and how we wished our offices could be on a pirate ship. We’ll be seeing clients on the deck. Walk the plank when your appointment is terminated. 
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
And the names are……
18 Jul 2011 3 Comments
in * R. i. P. *, Adam, Adam Sontag, Family, Music, Poetry, The Wee One
If it’s a GIRL: Tatum Marisann Reed
If it’s a BOY: Dylan Andrew Reed
Neither one of us believes in names without significant meaning. We chose Adam as a tribute to Adam Sontag and his middle name, Harrison, is the first name of Will’s deceased father. Tatum is a moniker that Will and I have always loved. Bonus points for the fact that Tatum O’Neal is someone whom I admire greatly. Marisann is a combination of my best friend– my soul sister– Maris [who also named her daughter after me!] and Ann, a maternal family name from Will’s side. Doesn’t it sound so unique and French-y?
Everyone knows I’m a lover of the written word. I am also passionate about music. So Dylan serves as a perfect way to fuse my penchant for the poet Dylan Thomas with the timeless songs of musician Bob Dylan. Andrew was Will’s original middle name– it was changed from William Andrew Elder to William Anthony Reed for reasons too complex to discuss here– and we believe it’s important to recognize that a change of name on a piece of paper doesn’t change who you are.
Tatum Marisann or Dylan Andrew…..we can’t wait to meet you! Mommy, Daddy, and Adam already love you so very much. <3
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
8 years
08 Jul 2011 Leave a Comment
in * R. i. P. *, Adam Sontag, Death
That face made me melt every time
My darling Adam,
Eight years ago you left me so unexpectedly. Has it really been that long? Almost a decade….god, I wish I had more to show for it, though I know I have accomplished so much and you would be proud. More often than not I feel as though I am stuck in limbo, present but not really here. I’m content with my life but nowhere near where I envisioned myself at this point in time. It never gets any easier. Time doesn’t heal all wounds but I suppose it offers a coping mechanism as you learn to go through the motions of existing without a piece of your heart.
Loving me is no easy task. You were the first– and the last– to experience me in my purest form. After you left I became bitter, angry, cynical, and lost. My innocence died when you did. I find myself comparing everyone to you, be it a friend, lover, or coworker. Far too many people in this world are forgettable and unoriginal. Adam Sontag, you were 110% unique. There will never be anyone like you.
While I’m not religious and my thoughts regarding an afterlife vacillate daily, it comforts me to think that you can see me and are paying attention. So if that’s the case you know between my pregnancy, the lack of justice for Caylee Anthony, and my general state of mind I’m not feeling my best. However, this year has been monumental for me in the sense that I finally stopped blaming myself for your loss. For the longest time I found every reason I could to make this tragedy my fault, mainly because I demanded you visit me for summer school. And this year I let it go.
Those boys....
Today your mom left a comment on Facebook: “I know he loved you so much. The first time I saw you with him was when you came to Arkansas and he was so happy.” It breaks my heart that was the only family event we did with your side. Because we were slated to have world’s longest engagement [a ring and proposal before college and a wedding after graduation] I assumed we’d have plenty of time in the future. Time just wasn’t on our side.
So many people miss you. Me. Your family and mine. Our parents. All of our friends. And especially your little brothers. They’re not boys anymore, but men. I know you’re proud of them…..they miss you terribly. Everything happens for a reason? Yeah right. We’re still waiting for that one. Life can be so cruel and unfair.
I love you, Adam. Please understand why this was the first summer I was unable to visit your grave. Every day I look at your pictures and smile. You gave me some of the best times of my life and it is an honor for my firstborn to be your namesake. It is my greatest hope that we’ll cross paths again when I leave this planet because I’d want nothing more than to see that wonderful smile and be greeted with a hug and a ‘hey baby.’
7/3/03 - our last photo together
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
Something’s fishy
18 Jun 2011 Leave a Comment
in Adam Sontag, Family
Ethan and Matt
My jaw just about hit the floor when I saw this picture. Those are my little brothers….I haven’t seen them since they were boys barely in the double digits. And now they’re MEN! I can’t get over how grown up they look. I wish their older brother, Zach, was in this photo but I’ll have to get another one soon. Ethan and Matt, I love you so much. Even if we’re not talking as frequently as we’d like due to various life circumstances, please know that I am only a phone call or message away. Adam would be so proud of the men you’ve become.
With infinite love, gratitude, and respect,
Sloane
